


The Adventures of the Great Bellatrix

by sadnymph



Category: Original Work, The Adventures of the Great Bellatrix
Genre: 1066, Butterfly Effect, Historical Inaccuracy, Multi, Other, yellow skies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:01:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28226550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadnymph/pseuds/sadnymph
Summary: based on an inside joke, and that one time my friend max and i played with and later buried a condom that we found in my dad's bedside cabinet, i present to you probably the most insane story you will ever read. also, i hope this doesnt go viral.





	The Adventures of the Great Bellatrix

it all started then.

an incredibly long time ago, back just before stuff like the battle of stamford bridge, there was a young boy called edgar. young, pure and innocent, he charmed everyone he met. aside from being a lovely little chap, he was in fact prince edgar aethling of england. 

one sunny afternoon, edgar was playing in his room when he heard a twitch from under his bed. this alarmed him, so he bent down and had a peep. it slithered and writhed through the gloomy shadows and general darkness (it was under the bed, of course) and then it stopped. from here, it looked somewhat shiny and... wet? edgar tilted his head in confusion, then smelled the air. aside from being a bit dank (as castles are) it smelled a bit like pasta. he didnt think much of it, so he reached out and touched it. before he could get a good feel, the mysterious object fucking WHOOSHED out from under the bed and hung in the air atop some clouds. it had kawaii sparkly eyes and a smile like :3> so yes that was a trainwreck. 

"who are you?" edgar murmured. wait is murmured the right word??? fuck it

"i am bellatrix, the magical flying condom! i come to little boys and girls like yourself and make them feel better! ive heard youve been down in the dumps lately, let me cheer you up by taking you on an awesome adventure! hop on!!"

edgar, being like 10, didnt know about stranger danger, because of course, he was a prince. and it was like 1066. ah well. so he enthusiastically hopped on top of the clouds bellatrix was sat on, and they whooshed out of the window. just outside, stamford bridge had begun. and this event of edgar aethling flying away will alter history forever. ANYWAYS

so yeah, edgar and bellatrix soared into the yellow sky (i mean, if you look at all of those historic tapestries, everything is yellow) and history was about to be altered forever. yeah. um

**Author's Note:**

> i would be absolutely fucked if this went viral. new chapter next week


End file.
